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Don't you know that it's different for goals

'Step right up Ladies and Gentlemen, don't be afraid. We got goals. That's right. If it's goals you want, we got 'em. 'Short goals. Tall goals. Fat goals. Thin goals. Goals that'd make a bishop kick a hole in a stained glass window. That's right. All the goals you need, when you need 'em. Goals so sexy they'll make you forget to pick your kids up from school. Super goals. Eggsellent goals whatever way you like 'em. Poached, boiled, fried and scrambled goals. Sunny side up. Sunny side down. 'That's it. Step on up and get some of Dr Arsene's Penalty Box Tonic. 100% guaranteed – and I mean 100% – to get you the goals you need. You sir, what's your name?' 'Oliver.' 'Where you from Oliver?'...
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